#23: The Hurricane Heist

A government stooge, a redneck ex-soldier, and his meteorologist brother stop poor people from stealing 600$m dollars at 600 MPH.

And they're the "good" guys!



 I have a real problem with American-Trope stooges trying to stop people from bettering their lives.

It's always the people who the government has forgotten, who the government hates, who are willing to risk their lives for wealthy politicians, and it makes zero sense to me.

That's not too different from real life, honestly, and it baffles me here too.

This takes place in Gulfport, not too far from me, and it's basically a worse Panama City, FL.

The people who live there? They know it's a shithole, the police know that as well. So, they work with technicians at the treasury (did they put a treasury there bc they know people think there is nothing worthwhile in Louisiana or Alabama?) to try and steal the money...that is going to be destroyed, taken out of circulation.

The more I think about this movie the more I absolutely think they wasted a perfectly good nonsensical plot. Geostorm did this movie better in spades, from the sound design to the visuals, but this movie only cost 35$ million dollars.

 I don't think the intention was "Look down on these people because they're poor, and poor people are malicious, stupid and greedy.", but that's really what came across.

Make your movie about people in lower-income areas - That isn't poverty porn. Do it.

The US Government continually fails its most vulnerable citizens, and many of them are poor. That's just the truth of it, and this movie is about those citizens finally standing up for themselves and doing something about a society that has ignored them and left them to die - they're the bad guys.

I thought America loved an underdog?


Also, the sound mixing is ... well, when it comes to hurricane related matters, it's great. It sounds like a hurricane. When it comes to PEOPLE TALKING, they want to play some dramatic-ass music over it.

And these people spit out some technical shit too, but you can't hear it worth a damn. It's a movie about a bank heist during a hurricane, I don't need Interstellar-Level Physics-Info Dumping.

Look, I am already having the struggle of my life trying to understand some of these people.

Jesus, can we please, for the love of god, just let Toby speak with his natural accent? I don't CARE if it would sound out of place, THIS IS A MOVIE ABOUT A BANK HEIST HAPPENING DURING A HURRICANE. Reality vacated the premises. That's my boy and he is very talented but if it was a choice between listening to him speak like that for another hour and a half and death, I would make peace with the universe and bounce.

There is one shining point and that is the action set pieces are all fairly ridiculously entertaining. Ever imagined throwing hubcaps into a hurricane and killing people? It's a thing.

Everything the "good guys" do is ... basically stupid. I'm sure the government will accept the fact that you lost money during a Category 96 hurricane or whatever the everloving hell, or that you gave up the codes to save someone's life.

Unfortunately, it's not 'So bad it's good'. It's just kind of an unintelligible slog. And as someone who loved Geostorm and Day After Tomorrow, it bums me out it couldn't even be stupidly fun.