5: Chevalier

 I have it on somwhat good authority that a lot of this movie is not only inaccurate, it paints Joseph as a far more forgotten figure than he was, rewriting the story to reflect more contemporary racist than the flavor of racism he dealt with in his time in France.

I also completely forgot to write this until a week later, so that says that.

1: M3GAN

 Yeah it's a little out of order.

As someone who is very familiar with both aspects this movie prides itself on (tech and dolls), it didn't scare me. I mean, it is PG-13, it's not like "Annihilation" or anything.

Honestly this review is 4 months late and the movie wasn't that impressive anyway. Did love the "Walk The Night" sequence.

3: The Super Mario Bros. Movie

 

 After years of deliberation, hateration, holleration, in this dancery, finally, the moment has arrived -- The Super Mario Bros. are back in theaters, 30 years after their last disastrous outing.

For a time circa 2014 -- 2016, I really liked Chris Pratt. Those times are over, and I'm trying to not let my personal feelings about the man color my impression of his work. Unlike other people, I do admit that he is a voice actor, not particularly a good one, but at this point, after being in "The LEGO Movie", its sequel, and "Onward", he fits the bill.

But he's not awful. I forgot it was him after about 10 minutes.  Miss Anya is worse. Peach gets some zingers that would be better with better delivery. Not everyone with a voice is a voice actor!

On the other side, I have been a Jack Black fan for nearly decades at this point and in the trailer, his Bowser does slip into comical accidentally, but here, it's 100% all the time. When it's menacing, whoo boy, I love it.

Somehow, the part I adored is the Jungle Kingdom? I am even less of a DK fan than I am a Mario fan (SEGA does what NINTENDON'T, of course), but Donkey Kong was probably my favorite.

In short, we have to talk about the elephant in the room; Is this better than either Sonic the Hedgehog Movie?

They're two different types of movies: Sonic movies have a narrative, as trite and clumsy as they are, and they integrate touches of Mobius into our world.

This is just straight up "OH I KNOW THAT," , "I RECOGNIZE THAT", and no story. If this had been a Sonic movie with all the references, it still would be very slight.

 This is winning no awards (Except animation for characters at The Annies). This is getting no nominations.